hi again...i rose from the dead

Hi.Holy fucking shit its been almost 2 months I guess no one missed me yet but yeah hey.Idk what to say hahahah i'm one hell of an awkward fuck😂

Have you ever felt like something isn't you 'thing'?Yeah..i'm stuck right at this point you see with nowadays fucked up society you need to be "smart" and have your degrees to get a job.But.. what if studying isn't my thing?If you have read my previous posts you can obviously tell I'm sort of a punk kid.No I ain't saying punk kids cant study.I'm just saying it literally ain't my thing,every since I was 6 I watched stars perform their hearts out on stage I knew that's what I want.I don't want fame.I want to be able to play my music do the craziest shit like stage diving.It's just me while here I am stuck.Forced to study.

I can open my textbooks and fall asleep almost immediately.I want to perform I don't want to study I ain't interested yet I'm somehow in the "best class" but what's the use?I want to be able to hear my own music on radio and head bang to them just like how I head bang and mosh to Black Veil Brides.Yes I need to be sure I won't fail then I can stop studying and do my music but to want your dreams its a 50-50 chance.I wanna risk it all,I want to have a band.I don't want a band for fame.I may seem bad ass or rebellious but fuck no.I don't wanna get all cocky but in all honesty I hate myself to the core to the bones.I just think that I have been through quite a lot of shit considering my family is fucked up from the very beginning.I have my boyfriend who helped me through things so if he could save me why can't I form a band and save all those suicidal angels out there.I aspire to play music,to save lives.You don't need degrees,you don't have to be in the medical fields to save lives.If I can save these lives before they end up in the clinics and hospitals for the doctors and nurses to try and save them.Why not?Why not risk the failure,risk my future?

Music save lives.Art is another release.I learnt it the hard way.Pens not knives,speak not die.I'm willing to risk everyone in this family I have to disown me because I'm suppose to be a good kid and replace my dead older brother.If it means saving lives and doing what I love,fuck I won't even mind having to live by the streets if I do fail.

The last time said no one could stop me from getting piercing well...ta da... honestly I get glares from my relatives from people in general but I no longer give a fuck.I plan to stretch my first ear hole and get tattoos at the end of this year plus a tongue piercing for my next birthday so honestly I'm too busy to give 2 fucks about your opinion:)

Anyways so yeah there are some drama in class.Like pfft I date WHO THE HELL I WANT.You get yo ass out of my fucking life.I may be quiet now but if I have to I wont hesitate to punch you motherfucking bitches.If you have problems with me being bisexual look here...FUCK YOU AND YOUR 18 GENERATIONS OF ANCESTORS bc you can go kiss my ass.I befriend your pathetic slutty ass and so I'm not enough teaming up to exclude some elses best friend and now taking her back to get as many people against me?Bitch that's low like a hoe you are.

So yeah that's pretty much it😝

YTFF

Well YTFF(YouTube Fan Fest in case you didnt know😊)was a few days ago for Singapore at least.I'm glad I met many Youtubers be it my first time meeting them or third or even a glimpse.Bc tbh Youtube,Bands,JB and Youtube is lifexP I hope to see them again ^^8

Self destruction

It's addictive.It paints beautiful pictures on your skin,leaving marks.

It scares people.It terrifies little kids.But that's how a monster is like.Till the day self destruction have the best the monster.

Then,the monster is perfectly human.Skinny,beautiful,scarred,cold,hard and dead...

Piercings<3

I admit I'm OBSESSED with piercing.So what?
So I went to get a navel piercing on Wednesday(23rd of April) after a self study session at Starbucks.

After doing several research on price,standards,etc. I decided to go to Rise Above Tattoo and Piercings.I was a little nervous while waiting for the piercer to arrive especially when I could hear someone getting their tattoo done.But I thought its 'now or never'(nope not an attempt to be all HSM3),when the piercer arrived I just followed him into a room. Before he started I was asked to lay on a chair,I kinda was regretting my decision about the piercing.I knew when I lift my shirt I'd be revealing my scars,my past and all the secrets I have hid for the past 3years.

Disregarding my worries and went ahead with the piercing.He first sterilized the needle and briefed me on the process and how to clean the piercing.Then he marked where the hole would be clamp and ask me to lay back down.

The piercing was really fast.It was about 2minutes and the pain subsided really quickly.

I'm really satisfied with the piercing and the piercer was extremely friendly:)

Although,my parents found out like 3days after the piercing(they weren't suppose too><).They banned me from getting another piercing till I'm 18 because it's "unacceptable to be overly pierced in the family".Pff they and their asian traditions...

They can't stop a wild heart.Let alone to stop an insanely wild girl.

Till the next time when I have something to blog about or another piercingxD

Peaceeee^^

Past

I still remember...I once had a friendship that was something I have always dreamed of as a kid...I lost it.

You had my back and defend me like a true friend would...I have no idea what happened...but I'm not human.I'm demon.Everyone leaves I'm not suprise...but I just yearn for that friendship.For the laughter we had.The fun,the secrets,the past we once had

I'm sorry....